365 Days, Day 359

The real skill is to raise the sails and to catch the power of the wind as it passes by (Thomas Berry)

If you're like many of us, you've spent years trying to feel comfortable in your own skin and to figure out what to do with your life. This is your most important purpose: to fully move into the power of your authentic self and to discover how to put that power to work in the world. There's a reason why you are here and a special way to accomplish your role in the world. But so much of us feel a lack of clarity around all this. We feel out of touch with our true nature and aren't sure why (Jean Haner)

Ariél and I have been throwing out ideas for what sort of business we could start together. She surprised me by saying we should start a catering business. She said, “You have to admit we are a-maz-ing cooks.” Hmm hadn’t quite thought of that as one of my strengths [powers]. My interest is piqued. Tick-tock, tick-tock.

A movement is needed, into the power of my authentic self. What are my powers [strengths]? Tick-tock, tick-tock.

My friend Gill sent me a text today telling me why I am ‘perfect’:

“[You’re] a fab wife, mother and friend. Actress, artist and [you’re] inspiring too. You have great clothes sense and lovely hair. [You’re] terribly brave with the move and travelling. You have more talent in your little finger than most people have in their whole bodies”. Aw bless! This really made my day. Thank you Gill!

So what to do with all my powers [strengths]? How can I harness them to start a business? Tick-tock, tick-tock.

At the moment I am trying very hard to work with love, as I sew the costumes (volunteer work). I, being me, insist on them being perfect and lined. Tick-tock, tick-tock.

365 Days, Day 358

'It's very provoking,' Humpty Dumpty said after a long silence, looking away from Alice as he spoke, 'to be called an egg - very!'

'I said you looked like an egg, Sir,' Alice gently explained.

(Lewis Carroll)

An unhatched egg is to me the greatest challenge in life (E. B. White)

The image of an egg is loaded with symbolism. New beginnings, life, fertility… omelette… My train of thought took a slightly different path there for a moment, as my brain tends to do.

Soufflé: I remember making lemon soufflé with mom at home. Warm lemony syrupy goo.

Omelette: I have never made one. Tom makes the most delicious light omelettes.

That’s all I have to say right now. Am feeling quiet because I have rather a lot to do today.

365 Days, Day 357

Look again at that dot. That's here. That's home. That's us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every 'superstar,' every 'supreme leader,' every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there - on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam (Carl Sagan)

Sitting still as stone watching - watching

People walking by you wondering why

No one ever stops to talk or thinks about it - if they ever did

People in every direction

No words exchanged

No time to exchange

And all the little ants are marching

Red and black antennas waving

They all do it the same

We all do it the same way

(Dave Matthews)

People-watching is quite fascinating. At times I weave stories about the people. Yesterday, in London, and then at the airport, there were just too many people to weave about, so I just watched. I photographed somewhat interesting people; well, that was my intention – but there were very few that fitted this category of “interesting”.

I noticed an interesting man in a suit, with dreadlocks (in his hair), but he seemed to be begging, so I did not photograph him. We came across him again later; he laid eyes on me and instead of asking me to put some money in his cup, he attempted to take my hand saying “Oh! I like you!” I avoided his hand and politely said, “Thank you,” as I continued walking. “No,” he insisted I really like you!” I did not dare engage with him anymore. So I walked away from a human encounter.

Another interesting character was a man I perceived to be American Indian. I might perhaps begin to weave a story about him.

Sitting next to a little boy at the airport, waiting, waiting… He remarks to his granny that there are so many, TOO many people. I agreed with him: so many people, each with their own little lives, their own contexts, their own histories – all intermingling. If I could freeze frame that moment, they would be captured for a spilt second of time together. A multi-coloured, multi-media pastiche all layered over another.

Little fragments of conversations, little frieze frame images captured in my mind. So many people. TOO many people.

365 Days, Day 356

I read the C.S. Lewis quote on Nicki’s Facebook status recently and decided to use it as a starting point for a blog: so here we are.

Sometimes pictures talk more than words. Sometimes other people’s words make more sense than my own, so today – the pictures and the quotes are doing the talking.

Miracles are a retelling, in small letters, of the very same story which is written across the whole world, in letters too large for some of us to see (C.S. Lewis)

There is a bridge to the sky within your soul and a doorway to healing and peace within your heart. If we look inside and embrace our true essence we bless the source of life. See beyond your vision and you will find a garden of harmony and joy where every breath is a source of inspiration. If we dream new realities we will open ourselves to abundant blessings. Together we can create miracles! (Micheal Teal)

The first step in making room for miracles is to realize that whatever difficulty you are experiencing, you are only seeing a very small piece of the picture (Melissa Casas)

Miracles seldom occur in the lives of those who do not consider them possible (Neale Donald Walsch)

I would rather make mistakes in kindness and compassion than work miracles in unkindness and hardness (Mother Teresa)

365 Days, Day 355

If I create from the heart, nearly everything works; if from the head, almost nothing (Marc Chagall)

Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force...When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand. Ideas actually begin to grow within us and come to life... When we listen to people there is an alternating current, and this recharges us so that we never get tired of each other... and it is this little creative fountain inside us that begins to spring and cast up new thoughts and unexpected laughter and wisdom. ... Well, it is when people really listen to us, with quiet fascinated attention, which the little fountain begins to work again, to accelerate in the most surprising way (Brenda Ueland)

The creative process is a process of surrender, not control (Julia Cameron)

Lessons learned from this costume making experience

I need to follow my nurturing path.

I need to be a nurturer.

I also need to be creative and make, from my own time and space.

I have also realised that I am good at what I do – I am a perfectionist (which is not necessarily a good thing).

In order to cope with stress, I need to be super-organised.

I am too old to be part of someone else’s obsession – I need to create my own.

My home needs me.

I have enjoyed exploring London (even the seedier parts) except when having to carry a heavy sewing machine (on the tubes and walking down into the seedier part of Camden)!

I would very much like to train in massage and aromatherapy.

There is SO much inside of me waiting to be set free – I need desperately to get the creative juices flowing.

I need to dance.

I need to be more sensual.

I need to surrender…

Something I read today: Ask others to name what they think is your most overlooked talent or character trait. Anyone care to respond?

365 Days, Day 354

We are not in a position in which we have nothing to work with. We already have capacities, talents, direction, missions, callings (Abraham Maslow)

In my next life I want to come back as one of my cats. They basically pretend we don't exist. They sit like two bumps on a log and watch us work for hours in the yard. They're probably wondering, along with the entire neighbourhood, why we work so hard in our garden and it still looks like hell (Annie Spiegelman)

Another day of work. I played music while I worked alone in the hall. It sounded a bit lame when some men came in to move sets, so I turned it off and worked in silence.

A highlight today was seeing, from the tube, as we passed a block of flats, a little white kitten perched on a chair in the window – basking in the sun.

365 Days, Day 353

Kissing is like drinking salted water, you drink and your thirst increases.

(Chinese Proverb)

In love, there is always one who kisses and one who offers the cheek.

(French Proverb)

The soul that can speak with its eyes can also kiss with a gaze.

(Author unknown)

I believe in pink.

I believe that laughter is the best calorie burner.

I believe in kissing, and kissing a lot.

I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong.

I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls.

I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.

(Audrey Hepburn)

My favourite part of today, was at one of the many stations I waited on - a white feather floated down and kissed my cheek before fluttering to the ground. A message from my guardian angel.

Today was not as overwhelming as yesterday. Maybe because I prepared myself better. I fashioned a Reiki bubble around me. I bought material that I thought was suitable without consulting anyone – just went with my gut. I made my way back to the hall quietly and at an even pace. I designed and fashioned patterns for the garments. And cut them out. Working in my Reiki bubble space.

The feather was an acknowledgment kiss from my angel, saying: well done, you dealt with today. Keep going.